Not gonna lie, it took some time to warm up to the Vibease. This toy’s vibrations are far more muted than the ones that emanate from the motors’ of the rip-roaring bullet vibes and bone jarring wands that I’m endlessly raving about on here.

I get it, low-key is an asset for a remote-controlled vibe that could potentially be worn out in public. It’s a bare minimum prerequisite for discretion.

But similar to the way I’m sometimes shocked to discover myself enthusiastically belting out the lyrics of some asinine teeny-bopper song I’ve formerly been known to openly mock  — the Vibease grew on me.

I guess you’ll have that happen from time to time.

The Vibease is a small, silicone-coated vibrator with an abrupt hook-shaped end. This curved tip is designed to lie flush against the external portion of the clit. It has two analog buttons positioned at the base of the toy.

All in all, it’s a pretty straightforward setup. There’s a power button and a separate one for scrolling through the speeds. You can choose to operate the toy with these controls or, instead, employ the Vibease app. It’s your choice, based on whichever you feel most comfortable using.

Although you can use the toy without accessing the app, the Vibease is primarily marketed as a wearable, app-controlled control vibrator. Which makes it an excellent choice for folks in long-distance or online relationships. Partners can access and control the vibrator’s settings through the downloadable app, even when they’re hundreds or thousands of miles apart.

Seeing as it’s a wearable, remote-controllable vibrator the Vibease can also function in the capacity of a classic “panty vibe.” The sort of vibrator that is great for a bit of playful teasing from a dom throughout the course of the day. Or just some plain old vanilla date night fun. It’s totally up to you.

By far, my favorite feature is this vibes unique ability to sync its vibrations up with downloadable Erotica Audiobooks, available via the Vibease app as in-app purchases. Through the sorcery of Bluetooth, the Vibease magically syncs up with the action in the stories you choose. With the vibrations ebbing and flowing along with the narrative, growing strongest at the most arousing moments.

What an amazing feat of technology! I can honestly say, I haven’t been this excited about narrated books since 1987. The year I received a Teddy Ruxpin “talking doll” for Christmas. That year’s jackpot gift from the Grandparents. Which in the weeks leading up to his untimely demise became my most prized possession.

I was near inconsolable when I returned home from school one day, to find that my baby brother had decided to share his apple sauce with my, dear, Teddy. Resulting in his articulating jaw mechanism gumming up and being rendered useless. My Mom, bless her heart, tried replacing him with a talking Mickey Mouse, but it was never quite same.

Yeah, I still hold a slight grudge, but that’s a whole other story. One we won’t get into today.

Instead, I think I should elaborate further on how I wound up with what the Vibease’s metaphorical tune stuck on repeat inside of my head.

I understood one thing as soon as I turned this little vibrator on. The Vibease was not gonna be a “Wham bam, thank you, Ma’am” sort of vibrator.

As a consequence of its intentionally muffled vibrations, I require a longer build-up and consistency to orgasm with this toy. Along with a level of steady-pressure, that frankly, is not achievable by placing the toy in my underwear and hoping for the best.

No, I need to be at the helm, guiding the Vibease. Actively pinpointing, what is, for the most part, my entirely buried clit; an infinitesimal nub that shyly peeks out from beneath my clitoral hood.

I wasn’t at all surprised to the feel the vibrations are much weaker and watered down with the vibrator jostling around loosely around in my lacy underwear.

Even while donning my full coverage stretchy lycra briefs, or what some lovingly refer to as “granny panties”, I couldn’t get enough support to compress and hold the toy firmly in place. To be more specific, I need it to be smack dab in between my pudgy outer labia and sitting snuggly against my tiny clit.

Generalities will not work in this sort of situation. Sorry, but we are talking about an exact science, here. If the vibrator dislodges and moves mere millimeters in either direction, you can guarantee I won’t be getting off.

So after a handful of unimpressive attempts at using the Vibease in its wearable capacity, I decided to download one of the Audiobooks of Erotica.

My first download was a colossal waste of time and effort. It was quite the trip, though. I was impervious to the narrator’s efforts to arouse me with his enthusiastic moans and the accompanying wet, squelching sounds of him feverishly stroking his cock.

In fact, I found it to be a huge turn off! To each their own. I’m not one to yuck somebody else’s yum, but that is not my cup of tea.

I finally hit the jackpot when I downloaded the title “Tasty Little Mess.” While I was still not one-hundred percent aroused by the narrator’s voice, I waited and listened patiently. Eventually, the combination of the sexy narrative, my vivid imagination, and the Vibease vibrations did the trick.

If it’s not blatantly obvious, already, the Vibease is not the vibrator the I’d grab if I’m in search of a quick and effortless release. It’s not the toy I’ll be running to when I’m in a hurry to come. Nope, the Vibease, with its Audiobook Erotica offers a unique experience, a much more deliberate and methodical approach to masturbation.

Which turns out to be a nice change of pace to my the usual hurry up and come approach: the old orgasm in a minute flat by slipping a hand under my waistband and smashing a bullet vibe against my bits or the even lazier wand over my pants technique.

I guess I’m not totally surprised by my affinity for the Vibease’s Audiobook feature. I’ve had a bit of a narration kink extending as far back as my late teens. I not totally sure of its exact origins. (Teddy Ruxpin, maybe??? I don’t know.)The first time I became acutely aware of its existence I was sitting in a classroom when I was struck by the realization that I was getting super wet from the teacher simply reading the instruction manual for one of those standardized tests. In that very moment, I knew I’d achieved the pinnacle of nerdiness.

If a multi-purpose toy is what you’re looking for, above all else, then the Vibease is the right toy for you.

Get your own Vibease Wearable Remote Controlled Vibrator at Lovehoney