This toy makes me smile. And why shouldn’t it? What with its cheerful shade of shamrock green and plucky caterpillar-inspired shape, replete with a tiny-little face beaming back at me.
It’s a true classic amongst the sex toy horde. I’d even venture to say that the Patchy Paul encapsulates Fun Factory as a brand. In other words, it’s a bright, cheery, unapologetically eccentric mascot of sorts. Not to mention, it possesses the famously potent 5G motor that you’ll hear sex toy reviewers incessantly clamoring on and on about.
Whimsy and aesthetics aside, this curious-looking vibe has more than proven to me as to why it’s remained a permanent fixture of Fun Factory’s catalog for the past two decades.
That being said, this love affair has not been without its share of obstacles. It took dedication and open-minded experimentation, on my part, to finally find our stride. Through trial and error, I was finally able to crack the code of the Patchy Paul’s quirks.
From the onset, I wasn’t entirely sold on this vibrator’s curious set of features. Before receiving the Patchy Paul, I’d been blissfully unaware that the first two-thirds of this vibrator’s shaft bears an extraordinary degree of flexibility. Guess I missed the memo or something?
This feature gave me pause. I worried that the chunky silicone shaft would neutralize the bulk of the vibrations, preventing them from permeating all the way to the tip. If one thing was clear, this didn’t bode well for my aspirations for the Patchy Paul to double as a killer external clit vibe.
Not only that but, when it comes to penetrables I’m more inclined to a firm steady pressure evenly exerted against my G-spot. My personal Toybox Hall of Famers, favorites like the We-Vibe Rave, the Sola Cue, and the Je Joue Fifi, with their rigid, silicone over ABS plastic construction, do the job supremely.
I think you catch my drift, relatively speaking, dense silicone paired with a flexible shaft spelled trouble for me and similarly devised vibrators. This combo is usually a no-go.
So I guess you could say, it didn’t come as a tremendous shock when my first few rounds with the Patchy Paul did very little to woo me. It didn’t take long for it me to discern that when the bumpy shaft is inserted horizontally, or totally unbent, inside me that it failed to produce the unyielding punch to my G-Spot that I crave. Worse still, as I’d dreaded, the thick silicone shaft did, indeed, muffle the G5 motor’s rumbly vibrations, resulting in an unjust representation of the thunder this legendary motor is capable of unleashing.
Which brings me to the dubious placement of the Patchy Paul’s singular motor. Curiously enough, it is embedded nearer to the looped handle, which by the way, is an accessibility-enhancing feature that I’m totally on board with. As opposed to the tip, where I would have ordinary presumed it to be.
This anomalous combination of features, the bendable shaft, and bizarre motor placement, left more than a little confused. Although I felt certain, that there was more than a good explanation for the Paul’s peculiar design. Somebody just needed to help make it make sense. The fate of mine and the Patchy Paul’s future hung in the balance.
Eventually, after a string of disillusioning, or I shall I say, orgasmless, test-runs I stumbled across the answers I’d been seeking. Suddenly, it all made perfect sense. The flexible shaft makes it possible to simultaneously have the curved tip inside me wedged nice and snug against my G-Spot, while the length of the shaft can be pulled back, against my vulva to grind against my clit. Well played, Fun Factory, well played.
This also means the motor sits flush against my clit, thrashing it with the most concentrated flavor of vibrations this motor has to offer.
This clever Lil’ maneuver allows me to indulge in some deliciously intense dual orgasms from one single toy. It also ensures I’m able to wring every last drop of pleasure out of the Patch Paul’s bumpy texture. Which in this scenario operates as a supplemental stimulus kneading my vulva and clit. What results from this combo is a medley of sensations that border on euphoric!
Having dual orgasms with the Patchy Paul is not only possible but probable. And it makes them attainable without the need for a separate clit arm or an extraneous clit vibe. What an ingenious design after all!
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